Just Another McDonald's Sunday

It was just another Sunday morning.  My lovely bride and I had were returning from grocery buying when we decided to stop by McDonald's (Mickey D's) for breakfast.  I would like to point out here that I ONLY eat Micky D breakfast food and their wonderful French fries.   The other reason we chose Mickey D's is that they serve Peppermint Mocha, my SO's first choice in a morning drink. 

Upon arrival at said Mickey D's #7240, we observed that the drive-through line was nearly two blocks long, so we opted to park our vehicle and actually walk inside to get our food.  So we entered Mickey D's, which is reputed to be a "fast-food establishment."  Let me just say that our experience with this particular McDonald's cast some quantity of doubt on that reputation. 

The young lady operating the only working cash register on premises was very bright and outgoing.  I have nothing but admiration for the way she did her job, both in welcoming us and in taking my order.  The incident which I am about to relate to you has no bearing on this young cashier.  May she have a blessed career at Mickey D's, full of opportunity for advancement.  The incident truly begins AFTER we paid for our meal.  The young lady thanked me for my order, handed my change to me, and said, "Your order is number fifty-eight."  I took my receipt and joined my spouse and the six or seven people waiting for their orders to be filled. 

A few minutes later, I noticed that more people were standing or sitting around waiting for food, and more cars were clogging the drive-through, but very few people were getting their actual orders handed to them at "Lane 3."  That's right.  After paying for food at Register 3, you were expected to pickup your food at Lane 3, a clear spot on the counter three spaces west of Register 3.  Remember, Registers 1 and 2 were unmanned even though there were several people in the lobby waiting on food.
But, to her credit, the young lady at Register 3 was able to take everyone's order in a timely and cheerful manner.  Not so much the cooking crew.

Normally, I would expect my order to be completed in two or three minutes and I would be out the door and on my way.  But I had been to this Mickey D's on two previous occasions, so I was completely prepared for the possibility that this food-buying foray would take slightly longer than three minutes.  So I passed the first five minutes by making pleasant talk with SO.  Then I noticed that more and more people were gathering in the lobby, but very few people were getting their food and leaving.  Similarly the drive-through contained the same vehicles that SO and I had seen when we entered the establishment.

Minute 6....
It was about here that I began to have some concern that the production time of our order was taking longer than usual, even for this McDonald's.  I mentioned this to my spouse.  She said, "Oh, we're not in any hurry.  And this is sort of comical, really."  I realized she was right.  The interaction between the various "crewmen" was comical, now that I was watching.  There were several team "members" working on two sides of a cooking line.  The orders that needed completion were displayed on very modern television screens, each order being deleted from the screen as it was finished.  High tech business efficiency at its best.  Unfortunately, the efficiency achieved with order-placing was not matched in the production area.

The woman who appeared to be the shift leader was busy making pancakes and frying hash browns.  The lady who appeared to be the head cook was assembling sausage mcmuffins at the rate of three or four a minute, while cooking other ingredients as well.  There were other people cooking other things.  The mystery was that no matter now many food items were cooked, no orders were completed.  Then the two lady leaders began shouting at each other.  One was demanding that certain items be cooked, while the other was telling the first lady that she HAD cooked those items, and then when the first lady demanded items that were already cooked, it confused the second lady and her helpers.  After some more shouting and accusations of mismanagement, some orders were actually delivered.

I was suddenly so happy...our food was nearly ready.  I was sure only a few of the frozen items stored in the back of the Tahoe had melted, and our order would be done before the rest of the chicken breasts thawed.  My mistake!  I head someone yell, "Number 65!."  I knew I was "Number 58" so I should have been "served" at some point before Mr. 65 got his Big Breakfast with large coffee!  I could tell that an annoyed blonde and a young man late for his shift at Taco Villa were both getting upset that their orders were not ready.  They had both been waiting longer than had my SO and I.  The blonde was making it clear through her facial expressions that she had been waiting long enough!

SO observed here that "this really is very funny!"  There was no way she could be upset.  The two apparent shift leaders had nearly caused a meltdown in the kitchen, the "front" people were still having problems completing orders.  Various components of partial orders were stacked up in various places along the counters, and staff were arguing about how many pancakes and hash browns were in what bags.  The drive-through line now extended out onto the Loop 250 service road, and SO and I had now been in Mickey D's for over fifteen minutes.  The blonde customer had perfected her patiently forbearing look, and the Taco Villa kid was starting to sweat.  A 'gansta,' I mean a gentleman in his early twenties who was dressed in a skull cap, long-tailed tee shirt, and baggy shorts pulled up to just below his buttocks had joined us in the waiting line.  He displayed signs of a latent desire to commit criminal battery against the Mickey D staff who were not filling his order fast enough.

Someone shouted "Number 51!" I said to SO, "Did she just call 51? 
"Yes, dear, she just called 51."
I said, "But they served 65 just a few minutes ago!"
Micky D staffer: "Number 68!"
SO: "There is no logic in their method."

At this point the agitated and impatient blonde took one step toward the counter.  At that moment someone shouted, "Number 52!"  The blonde walked quickly to the counter and took her order.  A second later and the young Taco Villa employee got his order and left the restaurant.  A very elderly man in front of me turned and gave me a knowing smile.  In that moment I connected with him and realized that he felt like if he did not his order soon he would probably need someone to call the funeral parlor for him. 

"Number 58!"
At long last our order was ready.  Sweetie had her mocha now and I had my two egg mcmuffins with sausage.  I went back to the cash register stand and asked the young lady the store manager's name.  She was suddenly quite alarmed, but provided me with the requested information.  I smiled at her, collected our order, and SO and I made our way back to the truck.  The "quick stop" for breakfast and coffee ultimately took eighteen minutes.  But I can say that I got to spend extra time with SO AND got entertained by the Micky D's staff all at the same time.  What could be better?  And I still get to call the manager and talk about the...er...less than stellar service SO and I received today.   Fast food, slow fulfillment, and service with a scowl, ah, all the things you may expect at Midland Mickey D's #7420.  Thank you for visiting, and have a pleasant week!