End of Watch: April 27, 2018 - Officer Charles Whites, Round Rock Police Dept., Round Rock, TX

Officer Charles Whites, Round Rock PD, died yesterday of injuries, and complications of those injuries, he received when he was struck by a drunk driver while working a fatal accident scene on February 25th.  The driver was arrested and charged with intoxication manslaughter.

Officer Whites suffered severe head injuries and numerous broken bones.  He remained mostly unconscious and unresponsive in the days after his injuries although at times signs of improvement were noted.  Nonetheless, the officer eventually succumbed to his injuries.

My personal observation as an one-time peace officer, and as a private citizen later, is that somehow traffic accidents seem to attract drunk drivers almost in the same vein that flame and light bulbs attract moths.  I never understood if it was the flashing red and blue lights that seemed to draw drunk drivers right into the accident scene, or just the confusion of having to maneuver through a street or highway obstructed by one or more disabled vehicles.  Once I read a study that showed that patrol cars, fire trucks, etc., that were equipped with bright, flashing yellow lights to the rear were not struck as often as those equipped only with red, or with red and blue lights.  Apparently yellow lights actually cause a drunk driver to (TRY to) exercise caution, and to fear police attention more than do red and blue lights.

Regardless of the reasons drunk drivers seem attracted to road side hazards, driving drunk is both illegal and  STUPID.  The deaths and injuries drunk drivers cause is senseless and so needless.  Police officers are endangered by drunk drivers, but then so are all others who are on (or even NEAR) the road when drunk drivers pass.  Not only that, but anyone who chooses to ride with a drunk driver is also tempting fate.

Just two nights ago out on a highway just northwest of Midland, a drunk driver managed to hit not one, but THREE bicyclists who were, as usual, riding on the shoulder, NOT in the road.  Two of the cyclists were dead at the scene, one is still alive and in a local hospital.  These two deaths were just the latest in a constant stream of fatal "accidents" caused by drunk drivers in the West Texas area.  And deaths at the hands of drunk drivers continue unabated across the state and the nation.

Officer Whites was taken from his wife and family, and his friends, needlessly, in what was one of the most preventable tragedies of all.  One person, a fifty-five year old man in this case, could have made the decision not to drink and drive.  The decision not to drink and drive has to be made BEFORE one gets intoxicated, because once a person is "ten feet tall and bullet proof," that person can easily drive a car, right?  What's the big deal?!  Everything is alright, until a drunk driver causes a wreck and kills someone or injures someone.  The drunk driver is rarely killed or injured in the wreck he causes.  I have personally witnessed a wreck in which the drunk driver did not even know why his car would not "work."  He had no idea he had caused a wreck and killed a man...not until he woke up in jail the next morning.

Officer Whites gave his life in the line of duty, not trying to catch a murderer or bank robber, but while directing traffic around an accident that involved, ironically, a fatality, a person who was walking along the shoulder of the roadway and a car, probably operated by a drunk driver, swerved onto the shoulder and knocked the man out into the grass.

Officer Whites' death is particularly tragic because it appeared, at least for awhile, that the officer was improving from his injuries, and might have had a long and hard, but successful recovery.

My prayers for Officer Whites' family and friends, not only in his death, but also in the long, hard road they all traveled while hoping for this officer's recovery.

And may God bless us all.

End of Watch: April 25, 2018 - Patrolman Rogelio Santander, Dallas Police Department, Dallas, TX

On Wednesday, April 25, Officer Rogelio Santander, a patrolman with the Dallas Police Department, Dallas, Texas died as result of being shot in the line of duty on Tuesday.  Officer Crystal Almeida was also shot, along with loss prevention officer Scott Painter, who works for Home Depot, the location where the shooting took place.

On Tuesday, Officers Santander and Almeida responded to the Home Depot in northwest Dallas, where an off-duty Dallas officer and the store’s loss prevention officer were holding Luis Juarez, who had been arrested by the private officer and the off-duty police officer after leaving the store with items for which he had not paid.  Juarez was brought back into the security office at Home Depot and on-duty Dallas officers were called to transport Juarez to jail.

At some point, the off-duty officer left the security office, leaving Juarez in care of Officers Santander and Almeida.  The off-duty officer went to out to one of the Dallas patrol cars to confirm whether Juarez had an outstanding felony warrant for his arrest, which in fact proved to be the case.  When the officers attempted to handcuff Juarez, he retrieved a pistol from inside his pants and shot Officers Santander and Almeida, and the Home Depot loss prevention officer. The off-duty officer heard the shots fired call over the police radio and returned to the Home Depot security office but Juarez was no longer there.  Juarez was captured later that night after a high-speed chase through Dallas.

My prayers and deepest sympathy to the family of Patrolman Rogelio Santander and to his colleagues at the Dallas Police Department.  Also my prayers for the swift recovery of Officer Almeida and the Home Depot loss prevention officer, Scott Painter.

May God bless and protect all police officers as they do their jobs every day in spite of all the dangers involved.

The Good Shepherd's Story: The Rich Man And Lazarus

In the New Testament, in the Gospel of Luke, Chapter 16, starting at verse 19, we are told by the Good Shepherd himself the story of "certain rich man" and a beggar "named Lazarus."  My own "un-religious schooled" opinion is that this story is not necessarily a "parable."  I believe that there was indeed a certain rich man living in Jerusalem, or parts nearby, at the very time that Jesus, the Good Shepherd, left his father's occupation as a carpenter and began his ministry.  I also believe that there was a poor man, a beggar, also alive at that time, and Jesus literally KNEW Lazarus.  Some more knowledgeable than me might argue the points just mentioned, but that is not the point of this post, so I will move on.

Lazarus, the beggar that the Good Shepherd knew by name, had lain at the gates of this certain rich man's property for a good amount of time, possibly for years!  The rich man was so wealthy that he "dressed in purple and in silk" and passed by Lazarus, who was "covered in sores, longing to eat what fell from the rich man's table."  Furthermore, Lazarus apparently had few or no human friends, and his only comfort were the dogs who came to him and licked his sores.  One thing that Jesus tells us by his silence on the matter, in my opinion, is that the rich man never gave Lazarus a single crumb from his "daily feasts."  As my preacher pointed out, this certain rich man had a "Thanksgiving feast" every single day, thus he pretty much ceased to be thankful for all his blessings, if he ever was.

As we know, a time came when the rich man died, "and was buried," and Lazarus died also.  Did you notice, though, that the Good Shepherd did not say that Lazarus was buried.  It was possible that he was found dead, maybe by one of the rich man's servants, and was simply carried out of town and dumped in a ditch or ravine, since he obviously could not afford a funeral.  I am sort of going out on a limb with this opinion, but remember, the Lord said outright that the rich man was buried.  He could have easily added that Lazarus was buried as well, but he did not.  Nonetheless, both men died at about the same time.

When next the rich man is conscious, we find that he is in some sort of spiritual "holding area" or maybe hell itself, I am not certain, but we are told by the Good Shepherd that the rich man, now in  burning agony, can see across a "great chasm" Abraham, the patriarch.  Lying in Abraham's bosom, who should the rich man see but Lazarus, whom the rich man recognized immediately!  How do I know this?  I know because the rich man, now so very poor and in torment, begged Abraham (whom he somehow recognized as well) to send "Lazarus" to dip his finger in water and cool the rich man's tongue.  The rich man knew exactly who Lazarus was.  He could see that Lazarus was being comforted by the great patriarch himself, after a life of receiving nothing but bad in the world, especially receiving nothing, no help at all, from the rich man who passed by him, maybe stepped OVER him as he came and went through his gate.  He had every opportunity to help Lazarus, but chose not to do so.

Realizing that the chasm divided him and the place of torment from the place of comfort and rest in Abraham's bosom, the rich man made what to me seems a very strange request.  He asked Abraham to send Lazarus back to the rich man's home to warn his five brothers of the torment that might be waiting for them as well.  Apparently NOT ONE of the rich man's brothers had lifted a finger to help Lazarus.  But the rich man believed that if Lazarus went back from the dead and told the brothers what awaited them, his brothers would perhaps change, maybe start doing good by sharing their riches.  But Abraham told the rich man a truth, one that you and I should heed and understand.

"But Abraham replied, 'They have Moses and the Prophets; let them listen to them."

The rich man made one more attempt to save his brothers. "No, Father Abraham, but if someone from the dead goes to them, they will repent." 

Yes, I am fairly sure that the remaining brothers were not the least bit more generous than their lately departed brother.  Else, why would they need to change?  But Abraham said, "If they will not listen to Moses and the Prophets, they will not be convinced even if someone rises from the dead!"

The Bible tells us in both the Old and the New Testaments that we will always have poor people with us.  Many times the poor exist right beside the rich, the "blessed" if you want to call it that.  Jesus knew that there were poor people throughout the world in His day, and that there would be poor people in our world today.  I am not talking about people who are too lazy to work, even though they have the ability to do so.  I am talking about those, like Lazarus, who are not able to work either because of physical disabilities, mental problems, or for other reasons are not able to, and cannot be expected to, get and hold jobs to provide for themselves. 

The story of the rich man and Lazarus is challenging to me personally, and maybe to you as well.  For one thing, I know that the Creator, and the Good Shepherd, had and have the power to end poverty or to otherwise create a situation where no one would ever have to be poor, except through the poor choice of not working for a living.  But God and Jesus did not do so.  Not only that, but I did not receive that wisdom it takes to know for sure whether some person who appears to be a beggar is actually a "con artist."  Oh, sometimes I can pick out a poor con artist (by that I mine a person who is a poor actor, not monetarily poor) but most of the time I do not know WHY a person who is on a street corner begging is poor or homeless. 

Have I ever been "ripped off" when I helped someone? Probably, because I know that there are some good con artists out there.  But have I ever FAILED TO BE BLESSED when I helped someone?  No, I have not.  First, in my ignorance of not knowing for certain whether or not a person to whom I gave money or food was actually "in need" I still had the satisfaction of believing I had helped someone, that is I had acted as the Lord's hands.  Second, I invariably received a blessing of one kind or another after I helped some poor person.  Not that I help with the intention of "getting paid back," but that I received some unexpected blessing shortly after helping a person in need; a blessing that I did not expect and did not ask for. 

But the point of the story (the TRUE ACCOUNT OF AN ACTUAL HAPPENING, in my opinion) is that you and I should take every opportunity to help people in need.  And there is a somewhat sobering, in not downright frightening, aspect of this story, that is that we who have the means should help in accordance with our means.  Even a "poor" Christian has enough that he may share with someone less fortunate.  How much more should the wealthy share with those in dire need.  And how frightening is the prospect for those who indeed step over poor people every day and never lift a finger to help, never share a scrap.  The rich man that Jesus spoke of fed his animals MUCH better than he fed Lazarus, whom he apparently never fed at all!  My own opinion is that Lazarus, had he been given a few left-overs from the rich man's table, would have generously shared his food with his only companions, the dogs who licked his sores.

Is this story directed mostly at "the rich?"  I don't believe so, but I could be wrong.  I believe the Good Shepherd wants all of us to help others, especially the poor, as much as we are able, but even more so if we have been blessed to the point that we are "rich."  Unfortunately, when a person becomes "rich" (that is has lots of money and possessions) it is very easy for that person to become somewhat arrogant, to forget from where the wealth actually came.  Yes, the rich man probably was a shrewd businessman, or maybe he inherited his fortune.  But somewhere along the way he began to believe that he alone, or maybe with some help from his equally selfish brothers, had become a "self-made man" who owed nothing to anyone, even to God.  And that was his undoing.

Don't let a lack of generosity and sharing be your undoing,  Yes, I think there are times when it is apparent that a "beggar" is actually a con artist, but if you worry about this possibility, you may NEVER help anyone!  Better to share, and occasionally be "taken in" than to never take the risk, and the OPPORTUNITY OF DOING THE LORD'S WORK.  I think one of the easiest ways we have of doing the Lord's will is simply sharing what we have with those who do not have as much.  But be warned, it is also easy to ignore the beggar, to step over him, and go about your business.  In so doing, you may well one day find yourself in that place of torment with the (not so) rich man, while you see the poor there with Lazarus, in the comfort of Abraham's bosom.

Take the Good Shepherd's words to heart...

And may God Bless you all...

A Day At Home...In THE TWILIGHT ZONE!

It is 3:30 in the afternoon, this being Tuesday.  I find myself with the gift, the blessing today, of being able to sit outside in a lawn chair and enjoy the day for awhile.  I am recovering, well pretty much RECOVERED, from a couple of medical procedures, but still not quite up to full par yet, but that is a blessing, in disguise.  It is a beautiful West Texas day, a little windy (surprise! - not) but the sky is that beautiful, deep blue that I have not found in other part of my beloved Texas.  West Texas, at least the stretch they call the Permian Basin, does not have a lot of "beauty" to offer, but the West Texas sky is certainly a point of beauty way out here.

I have spent most of the day watching/listening to Season One of "The Twilight Zone," believe it or not!  I had watched many episodes of the Twilight Zone in the past, but perhaps I was too young then to really perceive the depth, the social questions, that Rod Serling examined in many of these programs.  By the way, I am also listening to "spa music" as I sit here typing.  Back when I first watched the Twilight Zone I surely would not have sat around listening to "elevator music!"  I guess both my social awareness and my musical taste have changed over the years.  Not all of the (shh...a Blue Jay has just landed in the branches just over my head!) Twilight Zone episodes are in-depth examinations of social questions, however.  Some are ironical, whether in a lighthearted, whimsical way, or a "Karma in YOUR FACE!" kind of way (rats! the Blue Jay just departed my presence.  Even the short visit was its own blessing to me).

I had to interrupt my viewing of the Twilight Zone a couple of times, twice for chores around the house, once for yet another trip to the dentist (luckily everything was okay and I left the dentist without having to pay anything out-of-pocket...another blessing!).  After the dental visitation, I also had the pleasure (and the great and infrequent blessing) of having lunch with Child A.  He (luckily) inherited his mother's "brains;" therefore he is not only very smart, but is a brilliant conversationalist as well.  Lunch with him involves subjects as varied as current politics to why some people today feel the need to eat laundry products to feel socially accepted.  Child A's brain is powerful as some computers, and his intellectual take on both common and exotic subjects is always amazing to me.  I myself am a "plain and simple, ordinary man," so I am in an excellent position to appreciate Child A's intelligence and insights (Ahhh...now I am in the company of a red-winged blackbird. I never imagined that this bird would be a denizen of the semi-desert, liking water holes as much as they do).


I apologize for the brief interruption, but the lawn chair I was boasting about earlier suddenly and spontaneously split right down the middle of the back.  Hmmm....I hope this is not some cosmic remark about my current weight!  The chair did not break completely, thus I was not injured...but I lost my train of thought.  Oh yes, the Twilight Zone.  One of my favorite, more or less lightheartedly ironic, episodes stars Burgess Meredith (best known as "The Penguin" in the old Adam West Batman show) as a little, unimportant guy who works as a bank teller, but can't do his job well  because of his almost obsessive desire to read; to read ANYTHING, but especially classic literature.  He cannot read at home because his wife constantly throws away his books and magazines, and constantly demands household chores from him.  At work, our hero reads his books while trying to make change and keep accurate accounts at his bank teller's window.  He is eventually called into the bank manager's office and given a final warning: if he is caught reading on the job ONE MORE TIME he will be fired!  So, at lunch time he sneaks into the bank vault, locks the great vault door, and settles in for an hour of unadulterated, uninterrupted reading.  Alas, while he is in the vault, War War III occurs, is over within the lunch hour, and the city (presumably the entire world!) is reduced to rubble, with almost no one surviving all the nuclear explosions.

After the bombing is over, Burgess Meredith leaves the vault and discovers that he is the only living being in the entire city.  At first he begins running desperately for his apartment, calling out his (less than) beloved wife's name.  Soon he realizes that he can't find his apartment.  Nothing looks the same.  The streets are covered in the shattered remains of the tall buildings, and no landmarks are to be found that could have led him home.  Suddenly he stumbles across what once was a large public library.  The building is nearly completely destroyed, but many hundreds of books survived the explosions and destruction.  Hundreds of books!!  Our hero is in heaven!

Forgetting all about the end of the world, forgetting even about  his more-than-likely dead wife, Burgess Meredith excitedly runs from pile to pile of books, exclaiming with delight at his great fortune.  He finally has time to read ALL the books he ever wanted to, and without any interruptions, without anyone telling him to do his job, and above all, without any nagging from his wife.  Nothing matters now...because he can READ!  He then spends a couple of hours stacking books into separate batches, one for each month of the next two years.  Finally, after getting his books arranged just so, he sits down on some concrete steps and wipes his brow.  In so doing, he discovers a classic piece of literature laying just out of his reach in the rubble.  He quickly leans over to retrieve the book, dislodging his glasses from his nose as he does so.  Unfortunately, the glasses...though they survived Armageddon, alas, could not survive the two foot drop to the floor of rubble.  Both lenses shattered to smithereens!  Our hero cries out in anguish and disbelief!

Ah, the irony.  So much time to read now, so MANY books to read, no possible interruptions (discounting radiation poisoning, I suppose) and he broke his glasses!  For, you see, our little man is BLIND AS A BAT without his glasses.  And yes, not a single optometrist survived the nuclear attack.  But...could you expect anything DIFFERENT...when you are in The Twilight Zone???

Thanks for your kindness, your blessing to me in reading this post...

And may God bless you all...

The Austin Bomber: Case Dismissed

The Austin Bomber investigation seems to have died as suddenly as did the identified suspect, Mark Anthony Conditt.  After Conditt blew himself up (very nearly killing a SWAT police officer as well) the police were left with the job of determining what Conditt's motive might have been, as well as whether or not Conditt had left additional explosive devices around the Austin area.

The last current news about the Austin Bomber was published around March 25th or so.  I waited vainly for more information, but none was forthcoming.  No new information, just speculation based on the 25-minute "confession" that did not answer a lot of questions.  I realize that police agencies will not open investigation files to the public, but all of the agencies involved in the Conditt investigation have left the public in the blind.

The most recent news concerning the Austin Bomber investigation was actually published on April 9th, but was apparently not considered a big news event.  Also, I suppose, the Syrian government's (alleged) use of chemical weapons on its citizens overshadowed the news from Austin.  It turns out that on April 9th the US Attorney's Office in Austin dismissed a federal complaint against Conditt which had charged him with possession and transportation of explosives in violation of federal law.  The dismissal was a formality since Conditt was already dead, but additional details were contained in the federal affidavits that led to Conditt being charged.  Instead, such additional "details" were redacted, so that reporters received no more information than they already had, and you and I, the People, are left in the dark just as before.

Here are the words of Christopher Combs, Special Agent-In-Charge of the Conditt investigation:

We are concerned it could inspire other people to do other acts.  The subject in the audio confession says a number of statements that concern us, and we just don't want that to live forever on the Internet.

So we see that the FBI is protecting us from a "copycat" bomber.  I don't know about you, but I am not interested in a word-for-word diagram, with pictures, about how the bombs were made.  I am more interested in a couple of troubling aspects of this situation, that were never explored fully in the media, which for the most part seemed eager to publish only a strict narrative as provided by "the Bureau."

For one thing, there were numerous surplus electronic parts and chemicals in the Conditt home, found after the home was searched, but little information about whether or not the police believe that more explosive devices were assembled.  A second question is the choice of targets.  Many agencies were involved in the investigation, yet little information was discovered as to motive, or at least we were given little information.  Finally, the two roommates.  Two other men lived in the Conditt home AT THE TIME Conditt assembled his bombs.  Both men were interrogated by the police, but nothing of what the police learned from these two was released.  Did the police learn something important from their interrogation?  Did they learn nothing?  Either way, Agent Combs and his colleagues chose not to even briefly summarize the interrogations to the public.

So many unanswered questions beside the ones I raised.  Did the police find evidence of a method of targeting, a reason for targeting those who he did? Was Conditt either a member of, or inspired by, some political group or hate group? How did this young man know how to make and transport these devices without blowing up himself?  One officer speculated that Conditt may have "practiced" by detonating his home-made bombs "out in the field."  Apparently far enough out in the field that no one heard or saw anything unusual, I suppose.  But, before exploding his bombs, Conditt had to learn how to assemble the working electronics, yet do so, again, without blowing himself up in the process.  In other words, the bombs that blew up in Austin were probably NOT the first bombs Conditt had made. 

I am thankful that Conditt's reign of terror ended so quickly, and I praise the police for doing some good police work in putting the pieces together to zero in on Conditt.  But I believe that the people, especially the people of Austin, need more answers.  One of the most important things the people need to know is that the many law enforcement agencies involved in this investigation followed all leads and are reasonably certain that no one else is out there to carry on with Conditt's work.  No, the police do not need to release any dangerous details of the investigation, but neither do the people deserve complete official secrecy.  But it would appear that with the dismissal of the charges against Conditt, law enforcement has dismissed itself from any continuing investigation into this most disturbing and tragic story.

The Good Shepherd's Hands

It is sometimes difficult for me to understand how life can interfere so much with things I want to do, like daily blogging.  I have always thought that if a person really had enough desire to do a thing, the person would never fail to do that thing.  I have found that some things slow me down or at least I LET these things slow me down.  My lovely bride, on the other hand, managed to knock out, I mean, EARN a doctorate degree in nursing.  For me, having to work twelve-hour days while doing my job and the job of training a new employee, then immediately training another employee, was all it took to derail my "daily" blogging.

There is another "demon" that occasionally hinders my blogging, and that is, why is what I have to say important to anyone, or even just entertaining to anyone?  We have all had life-experiences that others would like to hear about, maybe learn from.  But why mine?  I am not a movie star, a politician, or even a local "big fish in a small pond."  Nothing that I have done in my life is really "stand out."  As one my favorite songs says, "I'm just a plain and simple, ordinary man." (RIP Dale McBride)

Having said all that, I once again start pounding the keyboard...

One of my dear friends (an actual friend, not just a Facebook friend) had a terrible experience today, but she was able to step in and render aid in a very critical situation, possibly saving a person's life.  It may be that my friend will never know whether the person to whom she rendered aid lived or died after she was taken away in that ambulance.  But I commend my sweet friend for doing what was needed when she could have stood by in shock and helplessness like several others gathered at the scene of the accident.

By rendering aid, I mean that my friend attended a lady who was trapped in a damaged, mangled automobile, keeping her vital functions operating until paramedics arrived.  She also attended two other victims.  I know from personal experience that when a person does his or her best to help victims of traffic accidents, shootings, or other traumatic situations, that person also invests a lot of heart and emotion.  Even if the person who needs help is a complete stranger, the emotional investment in those few awful minutes (that seem like HOURS!!) creates a bond that will last so much longer.  Quite likely my friend will never meet the person she helped so much, or that person's family, but she is bonded with this person, and concerned about the outcome, just the same.

It is now been over five years, but I remember it like yesterday, when my wife and I were involved in a similar event as my friend.  My lovely bride and I were travelling from Surfside Beach to meet my cousin for lunch in Pearland.  As we travelled north on Highway 288 and had just left lack Jackson, I happened to look in my rear-view mirror where I saw a pickup nearly a mile behind our car, weaving dangerously in and out of traffic while travelling at a much higher rate of speed than all the other traffic.  As the pickup quickly overtook us, I moved into the right lane and carefully watched this vehicle, ready to take evasive action if necessary.

The pickup flew past us like a rocket, swiftly changing in and out of the traffic lanes, nearly side-swiping numerous vehicles in the process.  I told my lovely bride that this was not going to end well.  The pickup was gone within seconds, and we momentarily lost sight of the pickup as our view was blocked by the Highway 35 overpass.  But as soon as we passed the bridge we saw a white car literally in the grass to the right of the right land and shoulder.  The car looked like an army tank had run over the back of it.  And we literally saw debris still falling from the sky as the pickup, now on its side, skidded down the shoulder.

Of course we stopped, along with almost all the traffic.  My lovely bride and I went to the car first, arriving just as two off-duty firefighters arrived and opened the passenger door of the car.  There were four people in the car, and a very strong smell of gasoline.  Fuel was seeping out of a broken gas tank.  The person in the front seat, the mother, was not severely injured but was clearly in shock and disoriented.  Two younger kids and a teen-aged girl were in the back.  All three were seriously injured but the teen-aged girl was unconscious and barely clinging to life.  Even a layman like myself could clearly see that she was near death.  My lovely bride took charge of this young lady while the firemen removed the others from the car.  I had found a man lying in the grass and I thought the pickup had hit him, but in fact the man had jumped out of the way as the pickup hit the car.

He was not injured physically, but he was aware that the young girl was badly injured, maybe dying.  I left him briefly and went to the pickup, where a couple of men helped the driver climb out.  He was a young man, only twenty or so.  He asked if he had hit something, and the smell of alcohol flooded him and his vehicle.  Yes, he was so drunk he could barely stand.  I left him in the care of the two men, and about this time the first police officer, a captain with the Brazoria Sheriff's Office, arrived on the scene.  I told him about the driver then went back to stay with the man I had found in the grass.  By now the full reality of the situation had come home, and I held him as he cried.

My lovely bride had never left the young lady's side even though she was trapped in a car that could go up in flames any second.  Firefighters had arrived and were washing away the gasoline, and in the distance I could hear the sound of rotors.  A helicopter was coming for the young lady.  She died, however, before the helicopter landed. The other children were flown away.  Eventually the "scene" was cleared and traffic once again was able to move down the highway.

After I had spoken to one of the officers working the accident, I turned to locate my lovely bride, and found her standing with another nurse who had stopped several minutes after we arrived.  My lovely bride was soaked with water and gasoline.  And when I went to her, she broke down as the emotions she had to restrain while caring for this young girl erupted to the surface.  The traumatic things these people went through, the helplessness as this girl's life literally faded away while my wife held her, the sheer stupidity and senselessness of the man's actions that caused this terrible accident. I am sure all of these things my lovely bride felt were similar to the emotions my friend went through today.

As a police officer I was in this situation many times, and was trained to function even with the emotions and tragedy.  Nurses are much the same, in that they have to continue to function even in the face of emotion and tragedy.  I am always impressed when I see or hear about "civilians" who are able to render aid or do whatever it takes to control a situation, because most people are not "trained" to maintain calm, at least a functional calm, when faced with a horrible situation.  And after the situation is "over," the emotions jump out, and very often there is not a suitable release, other than to just talk about it with someone.  The emotions do not just "leave." People who witness terrible sights and help those who are injured will relive the scene time after time.  And they may be unable to put the emotions behind them because they cannot learn the outcome, the "epilogue" to their experiences and efforts at the scene.

To all who have ever rendered aid, rescued someone, defended a person in danger, even if you never know the actual "outcome" I commend you all for what you have done.  But even more important, those that you helped appreciated it, even if they can never tell you.  You did for them what was needed at the time, and that is a reward in itself...the Good Shepherd said "It is more blessed to give than to receive."  And when you gave all you could, in that traumatic situation, you indeed become the hands of the Good Shepherd.

For Carla