Desert New Year's

I would like to wish everyone a Happy New Year! Yes, I know it is now eleven days into 2012, but this is the first time I have been in a blogging mood in some time. You see, Christmas Eve and the following days, all the way to New Year’s Day, were days of turmoil and pain for my spouse and I. After over a quarter-century of marriage, and after gaining the “wisdom” that someone over fifty years old should have gained, I still managed to hurt the one I love, and to cause pain that has lasted into the New Year.

Yet a marriage of twenty-eight years is a marriage that has stood many tests, has weathered many a storm. The branches may bend, almost to the point of breaking, yet the strength of the entire tree is able to hold firm in times of trouble. And so it did in this case. Still, feelings were hurt and a beautiful heart was broken. And I had a much more important and urgent task at hand besides writing this blog, as important as this is to me.

I am happy to say that S and I have made new vows to each other, and that we have embraced the New Year with gusto and high hopes. It is so amazing and so wonderful that after spending twenty-eight years with each other, we still have things to learn about each other, adventures to share, and life to live together to the fullest. I can only say that this marriage, even with all the ups and downs, reminds me of that most wonderful passage found in St. Luke, Chapter 6:38 (Jesus speaking)

Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."

You see, when one spouse gives to the other, that spouse will receive a similar, or even greater, measure in return and vise versa. Ideally the measure will be like that mentioned in the Good Shepherd’s words above. Unfortunately, when one of the spouses ceases to give back in full measure, the marriage suffers. The spouse most giving begins to feel that the other spouse suddenly finds her no longer as interesting, as appealing, or as beautiful, as she once was. And the spouse who no longer gives also begins not to receive or acknowledge the love and valuing that the other spouse still gives so unselfishly. The two now begin to grow apart, setting the stage for eventual pain and heartache.

In reality, the good spouse, like the Good Shepherd, has a forgiving heart, and has never stopped giving in full measure. Like the Good Shepherd continues to love and bless a constantly sinning people, so the good spouse continued to love and cherish the greedy and selfish person her spouse had become. With the time spent together during the holidays, my spouse and I were reunited in love and spirit. Like the Good Shepherd, my spouse had not drifted away, but stood there waiting and watching for me. And like the Good Shepherd, she came to me with open arms while I was yet at a distance.

I hope everyone has a Happy New Year, and I join you in celebrating the happiest one I could ever wish for.